it seems we humans enjoy living life with willful ignorance.  if its true, if ignorance really is bliss, then we strive for bliss with every fiber of our being.

we live life like there were no consequences.  we love, never truly showing that tomorrow, the ones we love could be gone.  we spend like the job will always be there.  we live, like tomorrow will always come.

when we lack our own stability, we create it wherever we can find it.

and it takes bravery and courage to stop.  to begin to ask the hard questions.  to change the way we look at life.  it takes bravery to tell yourself that your job may not be there tomorrow… that you really need to talk to your roommate about their substance abuse…. that we shouldn’t take advantage today, of what may be gone tomorrow.

so many of us are blessed to punch a clock.  to work our 8-5 and know our paycheck will be waiting.  to know that the same amount will always be deposited in our checking account.  we have our set of responsibilities and as long as they are completed by 5pm on Friday; the weekend, and the paycheck are ours.

Christs first choices never had that.  they never enjoyed that sense of security.  they lived and breathed the seeming randomness of the sea.  they could never bet on what they’d bring home.  they’d never know if it would be a big payday, or if their family would go hungry…they worked and toiled with all they had and there was no guarantee.

they lived life without a security blanket.

maybe God was trying to tell us something.  maybe He was trying to tell us that in this fallen world, life could change in an instant.  that the people we know and love could be gone in the blink of an eye.  that our 8-5 could be outsourced or downsized.  that life was meant to be lived because there was no guarantee outside of Him.

they never had stability and yet, they still got up every morning.  they could never find a firm foundation on their work and yet, they risked their lives every day.  they had families, friends, community.  and eventually, thet found their foundation in the only rock that would never move from beneath them.

im guilty too.

ive lived the past 27 years going from mini-crisis to mini-crisis.  as soon as God dealt with one, or i stopped freaking out about it, something new would rise up.  some new wave would threaten my oh so precious nets.  the boat would rock, id get splashed…

and id realize with a *gasp* that i was in a tiny little boat on a world covered by water.  id realize my life was puny, tiny, and of little consequence… and id scramble… id check my rigging, my nets, the boats course.  id double and tripple check…. all in the vain attempt at keeping all the balls in the air.  driven by the fear of coming back to port, a failure.

ive lived the past 27 years, in so many ways, simply running around my little boat.  so afraid that when id come back to port, id come back empty.  id come back, a failure.

and all this time, ive missed the One, walking on the waves.

there is no promise in this life…. even for followers of the Master Fisherman.  loved ones are still torn from us, decades before they should have been.  jobs are lost, friendships fail… life, even with the Saviour, can be breathtakingly painful.

He never promised an easy ride, but he did promise to be with us.  no matter what.  He promised to never leave us, to never leave me.

and its in those arms, that promise, that hope… that i must find my foundation.  that i must plant my life, and build my future upon.

because its in those arms, that life can be breathtakingly beautiful. 

p.s.
go listen to mutemath,  track 13.

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