God doesn’t hold your past sin over your head.

If you’re like me, you carry regret.

Regret of past sins, decisions you made and shouldn’t have or decisions you didn’t make and wish you had.  Things done, words you wish you could shove back in your mouth or left things undone and unsaid.

Regret.

For some of us, it becomes a part of who we are.

And even though we hate the way it feels, even though we hate the loneliness it brings as it wedges itself between us and our dreams and loved ones, we begin to identify with it.  It becomes part of how we see ourselves, and we never learn to walk free of it.

We never truly learn the meaning of the word grace.

At church this weekend, the worship leader took a moment and shared what he felt the Lord put on his heart.  That being, that God doesn’t hold our sins against us.  And that our lives don’t have to be governed by mistakes made years or even decades ago.

It spoke to me, deeply.

I realized that I’m still carrying regrets from decisions I more than 20 years ago.

I cannot change them.  I cannot undo and unsay.

But I’ve realized that they are no longer a part of who I am.

They are a part of who I was.  My history.

Covered by grace.

It’s time I forgave myself, encouraged my heart and told regret to leave and never come back.

I am not what I’ve done.  I am not who I was.

I am not perfect, but I am loved.  I am my Heavenly Father’s beloved son.

And because I am loved, I have everything I need.

Bethel Music – You Know Me

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