so ive spent the last few months constantly worrying. fretting non-stop that ive made or will make some massive mistake. some end-of-the-world, game over thanks for playing, bang bang your dead mistake.

fear sucks.

i know, deep thoughts for this evening huh? welcome to me drowing in the depth of a parking lot puddle. but thats fear in a nutshel isnt it? a parking lot puddle. dirty. murky. so filthy its almost opaque…. but if you took that step and just put your freakin foot down you’d realize it was only centimeters deep…

and suddenly the parking lot seems a lot less intimidating. suddely, the things you’ve been fearing dont seem as overwhelmingly powerful. suddely you realize how much bigger the God who lives in you is compared to this measly, filthy collection of scum.

you take that step and suddenly your world changes. suddenly your point of view, your perspective changes. and your breath is taken away. and you realize that life may be littered with puddles. some bigger than others… some deeper than others. but thats just it… they’re freakin puddles.

ever see a dedicated runner out when its raining? they’re not dodging puddles. they’re not trying to sidestep the very byproducts of the world existing around them… they have a goal in place. their gate is steady. their eyes are fixed on the prize. now dont misunderstand, they are very aware of their surroundings… but they are focused not on their surroundings, but on where the surroundings point to.

puddles come from rain. and rain, from the rainmaker.

and if there is a rain maker, and if its true He loves me as much as He says He does, and if my steps are as ordered as He promises them to be, and if His plans for me are for good and not evil, for hope, and for an expected end… then who am i to let some dirty puddles stand between me and this rainmaking God?

Lord, you’ve given me these words. these words have not come from me. because right now, i dont feel this way. right now im still afraid. im still afraid of puddles. of messing up. of not measuring up. please help me to realize that your Son did all the measuring up that ill ever need. help me to rest in that…

and run to You.

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