if yesterdays word.. or two days ago… oh goodness, whatever. if my last word of the day was “change”. Today’s word of the day is inadequacy . Websters defines inadequate as: not adequate, insufficent, not capable.

in this wonderful world we call ‘job hunting’ – ive done more battles in my mind over my own feelings of inadeqacy than basically anything else. nothing like your entire world falling apart and your family going through hell to make you feel ready to take on the challenges that life brings right? wrong. when you go to bed every freakin night knowing that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do in and of yourself to change one iota of what really matters – all feelings of adequacy quickly fly out the window. it seems like when my feelings took flight – there were some duck hunters outside who decided that my feelings would make some great dinners… because i sure havent seen them since.

recurring themes – i dont know if the average readers of my blog can tell – but i have a few. one of them being that, quite simply – God is all i have left. there isnt anything else i can do.

ok. enough of the crap of my life.
spent a wonderful evening with a very special friend last nite. very relaxing. if the tv wasnt on, im positive i would have drifted off to sleep. and in other news, ive got an interview today @ 4pm – so if you would think of it (stealing something from vals blog) – keep me saran wrapped in prayer?

who knows, maybe this whole adequacy thing is actually me learning something. we all have needs. and it seems that the only ones who are willing to either ask for help – or accept it – are those who have had everything else shredded.

but hey… who am i?

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