i miss you.

i know ive done everything possible in previous postings to not broach this subject. ive written so many things about dealing with life, about living, about having the rug ripped out from under you… ive intentionally written about everything else there is to write about. but at the end of the day, if im honest with myself; i do, i miss you.

im sorry i dont know how else to express to you what im feeling. “i miss you” hardly covers it. and i know that for the most part, if ive said anything on the blog, its only had to do with moving on. that is part of the truth. that is part of what im feeling, definitetly. but its not all of it. it is absolutely not a lie. but its not the whole truth.

the whole truth would include care, questions, wonderings and im sure some whys would be thrown in there. the whole truth would show you how much watching this expanse grow, hurts. it would express how; well, you said it yourself. maybe not in so many words, but your basic thought was how important our feelings were. for, if nothing else, they validated how much someone meant to us.

my point? im not sure totally. but you need to know, and i need to say, you’re still valuable. and saying goodbye hurts. and maybe in this case, those two things go hand in hand.

i dont know what the future has now. you and i were inseparable. and now, well. its not that way anymore. i dont what to do now. i honestly dont. i dont know if this is goodbye, or see you soon, or… i just dont know. i guess its whats next isnt it? its whats coming. and its where the roads are leading us. so bring it on.

i pray for you, for the roads we walk from here on out…. i pray that we may always discover. i am thankful for the God of all things new.

may God be with us. and may life be breathtaking.