there are moments when i sit and inspiration just comes.  the sounds of birds awakening the dawn, the dark, bitter taste of hot coffee, the warmth of the first rays of sun breaking across the land.

and there are moments that i sit and await inspiration.  and it’s not there.  and i wonder.  wonder why i cannot seem to put my heart onto paper.  wonder why the yearnings inside of my soul are strangled on their way to my lips.  i wonder what life would be like if i threw caution to the wind.

it’s in these moments that i remind myself of the inspiration ive already been given.  of the truths i’ve already learned, the truths i lean on.  that i serve an amazing God.  that just one cup of His mercy covers more sin than i could ever commit.  that His love for me is amazing, beyond comprehension.  that He is the God who created life.  and if He created life, then He also created the art of living it.  and its in these moments that i recommit myself to following Him.

and i ask to see through His eyes.  to see things as He sees them.  to have my heart break when His breaks.  to hear His heartbeat, to become a son.  to know His love as deeply as i possibly can.  and to love as He does.

i can look outside of myself for the inspiration i need each day, or i can look to the one who gave grace, who’s Son paid the ultimate price so i could be adopted.  i can look for inspiration from those around me, and find myself unsatisfied, or i can look to the one who Created the dreams in my heart.

i could look anywhere i wanted to for inspiration.  and because of my own fears, my father issues and my insecurities, i do.  i do, but i shouldnt.  because the one who Created life, is calling for me to live life.  to throw caution to the wind and follow Him as He leads.  to become a character in the amazing story that He wants to tell through my life.

when i look to Him, i realize i dont need to be inspired, i need to follow.  to drop the burdens i carry and simply follow.

when i look to Him, life may not make sense, but i know i have hope.